At our law office, we are committed to supporting our clients as leaders, in addition to providing them with needed legal guidance. We have found that leaders can be less effective if they are surrounded by people who are not helpful to their mission or goals. Knowing how to pick team members and advisors who are advocates can help leaders be more effective implementing their business vision.
On our law office team, we also try to lead through our actions. This means that what we “preach” in the office, we try to also do at home as well. This means being intentional about how to be a good partner and/or parent. So, this month, we are excited to introduce our featured guest, Aryana Hernandez, daughter of our senior paralegal, Alysia Morales, who took the time to provide her thoughts to us on friendship, which is her 3rd grade view on the Know your Advocates exercise. For those adults who are reading, you are welcome to check out our Know Your Advocates worksheet, which is the grown-up version of Aryana’s wise thoughts, and see how your feelings on the topic match up.
What does being a good friend mean to you?: A good friend is someone who can help you. They help you find your way with something new. You can help them. You learn together to be good friends and no one should be mean to each other when we ask for help.
How do you know who is a true friend and who is not?: When someone pretends to be my friend, they are a frenemy. A frenemy is someone who says things and does things that are showing that they don’t really like you. A frenemy says mean things to you and pretends its a joke. A frenemy tells people mean things about you or will tell other friends your secrets. When I was in 2nd grade, the girl I thought was my friend told the boy I have a crush on him that I like him. I was embarrassed because I told her not to tell. That wasn’t my true friend. A frenemy will make fun of your clothes but a true friend will like your style but doesn’t have to like every outfit you wear. A true friend says jokes to make me laugh and a frenemy will say jokes about me or make fun of me or make fun of someone else. A true friend will be happy when I bring a new friend to the friendship circle.
Is it okay to have more than 1 friend?: Yes. In 2nd grade I learned that it is okay and important to have more friends. Last year I had 1 friend. In the summer, my mom text other parents to make play dates for me. I now have 5 friends for the new school year and not just one friend. No one owns me. I can make as many friends as I want.
What do you do when you find out that a friend is not a true friend (a “frenemy?”): I won’t be mean or say that we are not friends anymore because maybe they don’t know how to be a good friend. So I still talk to them but I won’t tell them my secrets and I won’t let them tell me I can’t play with other kids. I used to only play with one person. Now I invite that person to play with me and the rest of my other friends. If they don’t want to play with us I won’t wait for her, I will go play and she can join when she is ready. I will still be kind though.
What is the most important thing your friendship must have?: We need help each other. I can show someone how to be a good friend and they can show me something new too, like something I don’t know. When I am in class, I won’t get mad when my friend helps me when I didn’t hear the teacher or when I did the math wrong. I listen to my friend trying to help me. When my friend falls down and scrapes their knee I help them. We need to help each other. My friends need to share like I do. When my friend brings fruit roll ups and gives one to me, I will bring some for them the next day if we have it. We must be kind to each other and help each other and think of how they would feel. My friends should be happy when I bring a new friend to play with us.